Players’ Report Card: Manchester United 0-0 Everton

Moyes was in attendance at to watch Wayne Rooney's Manchester United testimonial match

Wayne Rooney Testimonial against Everton end 0-0 against Everton

Jose Mourinho’s Manchester United bin wakka ontop Old Trafford pitch on Wednesday night to face Everton for Wayne Rooney Testimonial match. The match end draw sha.

Fashi say na only pre-season game, the way the two teams bin take the match serious ehn, you for think say na Premier League match. The only thing wey dey odd for the match, na say nobody fit tear net. United try wella for first half, but dem play rubbish for second half (Make i talk truth, the match dry for second half).

Na our player report card be this:

David de Gea: As Everton wakka enter this match to defend, dem no too give am work (na only few chances dem see). The only time wey dem worry am na when Ross Barkley shoot one ball wey dey fly enter net, and e push am commot. Number One. We go give am 6.


Wayne Rooney and David de Gea 

Daley Blind: Him na average game e get sha. But we no fit judge am wella as Everton no attack like dat. We go give am 5.

Eric Bailly: Him self na average game e get. As e tall, some balls wey Lukaku head, na balls wey e suppose head commot… E gots work on hin heading skills. We go give am 5.5

Luke Shaw: This guy na the Man Of the match, the way e take ginger for that first half ehn, no be small thing. E sure me say this guy sabi run fast, pass bullet. E remain small e for score the first goal. There get one mad shot wey e take, wey almost enter net after e deflect off Everton defender.We go give am 9.


That Mad shot wey Luke Shaw play for first half, it for enter net – e remain small

Antonio Valencia: E try sha, but e no reach the level wey e dispay against Galatasaray. Some of hin crosses make sense sha, but our attackers no sharp tonight. We go give am 6

Michael Carrick: This guy na our best midfieder right now. The way e take control game for first half make brain. E sabi hold ball, and e get football sense wella and when e dey hold ball, e no dey shake. United bin play wella, when e dey pitch. We go give am 7

Ander Herrera: E bin make many important tackles for first half and him and Carrick blend well. We go give am 6.5

Wayne Rooney bin play 53 mins, before e wakka commot 

Wayne Rooney: E try wella for first half, if say our attackers sharp ehn, e for don get many assists for the match. The through ball wey e give Zlatan inside box (Papa Ibro Shoot, but keeper punsh am), The through ball wey e give Martial (Martial con dey through on goal) but Martial no fit use the ball well and the chance waste. Then they get another ball wey e cross give Zlatan wey bring am down but hin shot na straight to keeper. We go give am 7

Anthony Martial: E no too play well sha but e fit be say him no wan wound as na still pre-season. If say Martial dey form, e for don score with that mad ball wey Rooney give am. There get one other ball wey e cross commot for stadium (ball wey e suppose cross well after e don already send defender go message). We go give am 6

Jesse Lingard: E try small but na only first half wey hin play. The way e take link up with Zlatan for the match make brain. We go give am 6


Memphis no play rubbish today sha, e don improve from last season

Zlatan Ibrahimovic: E bin dey everywhere for first-half. E ginger for attack, hin link up play make brain. But e bin drop too deep sometimes sha. But all round, e try. E gots work on hin finishing sha. E miss two goal chances. We go give am 8.

MORE: Juventus don give Dybala the No.10 jersey – Dem no send Pogba

The people wey commot from bench:

Marcus Rashford: As United midfield no gel for second half, e no too dey the game.. As ball no reach am wella like dat. The little times wey e see ball, e ginger for attack. We go give am 6.


Na the first match wey Jose Mourinho dey manage as United manager for Old Trafford

Ashley Young: This guy play rubbish, no be small. Most of hin passes against Everton na error. E no even cross any ball wey make sense. E go warm bench tire when season start if e continue dey play rubbish. We go give am 3.

Memphis Depay: All the times wey e see ball, e ginger for attack. E no play rubbish today but e no turn up like hin VESS DAYS. That bicycle kick wey e bin wan do, wey e no time well, funny gan, sote Wayne Rooney con dey laugh am. We go give am 6.

Morgan Schneiderlin: This guy no fit demand for ball to save hin life. The only thing wey e good for na to tackle ball. E no ginger for attack. Most of the times wey ball dey hin leg, na so so shake e dey shake. We go give am 5.

Maroune Fellaini and Morgan Schneiderlin dull the game

Maroune Fellaini: E no try jor. Him and Schneiderlin no work at all for second half. Dem two no dey creative at all. E remain small e for score (with header), and e remain small e for get assist (the ball wey e lay for Mata inside box). We go give am 5.

Phil Jones: This guy ehn, na everytime e dey shake, i no just understand. E no too play rubbish sha. We go give am 4.5

Marcos Rojo: At first e bin dey play left-back, Him and Young no link well. later, e con go centre-back, e no too do mistake sha. 4.5

Wayne Rooney na living legend 

Juan Mata: Na average game hin get. E lost for match self. we go give am 5

Matteo Darmian: E enter match late, we no fit rate am.

Henrikh Mkhitaryan: E no too impress me for the match. Any small thing, if dey touch am small, e go fall. E bin give the ball away sometimes self. We go give am 5.

MORE: Five things wey we observe as Manchester United draw 0-0 with Everton

The next match wey Red Devils get na against Leicester City on Sunday, 7th August. (Community Shield)




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