Players’s report card ontop Manchester United 3-2 Newcastle: Alexis sabi Fergie time!

I dey in really good mood tonight as the Red Devils don come from behind to beat Newcastle 3-2. At Half-time, Rafa Benitez bin dey form specialist, con dey smile but now e go don know say if ref never blow final whistle, say anything fit still happen. I no even sabi which goal I like pass, whether na Juan Mata’s mad freekick, or na Martial’s low strike, or na Alexis’s header (winning goal).

De Gea: Na average game wey e get. E no make any super save. I rate am 4.

Ashley Young: Na him wey cause the two goals wey Newcastle score. But I don forgive am, as na him wey do assist for Alexis’s winning goal. I rate am 5.

Luke Shaw: For first half, e dey play like head-less chicken but e con improve for second half. I go rate am 6.

Eric Bailly: Hin body dey pitch, but hin brain dey inside beer parlour. I go rate am 2.

Chris Smalling: E try wella. For first half, e mess up but e try pass Bailly, na why Mourinho no remove am. For second half, e con tidy up for back as e no allow make Newcastle see chance. I go rate am 5.

Paul Pogba: Na my Man of the Match, this guy play defence, midfield and attack. All round, na the perfect player against Newcastle tonight. I see am everywhere for that pitch, and e still manage get assist for Anthony Martial’s goal. I go rate am 9.

Nemanja Matic: This guy mess up for first half but e con reduce the rate of hin rubbish for second half. I go rate am 4.

Scott McTominay: This guy flop today jare. E no play well at all. I go rate am 1.

Marcus Rashford: E bin miss some big chances for first half. For second half, e con dey mess up when the whole team step up. I rate am 4.

Anthony Martial: E dey silent for first half but e con ball fire for second half. I like how e take link up with Pogba, Mata and Alexis. I go rate am 7.

Romelu Lukaku: Hin first touch na error but e sabi cross sha. E try for some of the link up plays. I go rate am 4.

Bench warmers

Juan Mata: E get good game. Hin freekick bin start the come back for United. I go rate am 8.

Alexis Sanchez: Na him wey score winning goal. I dey happy with am. I rate am 7.

Maroune Fellaini: E no spoil game. E try, I rate am 5.

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